Merrily, Merrily...Life is but a dream

It's 5:30 in the morning, and here I am. I am procrastinating getting in the shower, because that will mean that my day has officially started. I have so much to do, I'd like to pretend that I don't for the next few minutes. I actually have a moment of peace in my own house. I don't get those anymore. Would I miss the 'hectic-ness' if it were gone? Probably. But it's nice to have a break for once.

I am still so tempted to forget about any responsibilities that I have to face today. I just wanna go crawl back into bed with my baby Berek and cuddle until noon. But what would happen, inevitably, is that whereas Berek would love to lay with Mommy and doze quietly for hours on end, Shelbi is a different story. She would require me getting up to fix her breakfast, turn on the tv so she can watch Sesame Street, Barney, and 5 different disney movies....all within the first hour. (She likes to change what's on every 5 minutes). And then, again inevitably, she would demand attention every moment because she has this new habit of being a tiny tornado. She will open things, and pour out things, and get into things, and make messes of things, and put things in her mouth, nose and eyes. She will eat things (except for what I make for her to eat) and wear things, and remove things (like her diaper) ... (and her ponytail holder) ... and open dvd's and scatter them around. She will destroy things, knock over things, yell at things, yell at me, go outside, disappear outside, get dirty, and need baths.

But then there will be a moment of silence in which I will panic from the other room as I run in to see what's been destroyed, and find her sitting in her princess lounge chair, with her little hands folded in her tiny little lap, watching tv, or reading a book, or laying with Berek....tenderly touching his face or kissing his feet. Her angelic frame melts me. She is truly the light of my life.

What a perfect balance of turbulence, and peace. My life is truly more perfect than I could have ever imagined.