Life with a son...

Let me just tell you about the sweetest thing. I wake up at about 3-5 in the morning and look over at my new angel baby boy sleeping next to me. He's so tiny, and precious. His face is kissable, and his little body is angelic. I nurse him, and he drifts off back to sleep until about 8 or 9. When it's about 8 am, my gorgeous baby toddler girl comes toddling into my room and I get to cuddle with BOTH my kiddos for about 15-20 minutes. Then comes the routine. Which, by the way, is almost totally painless for me because I have my Mommy. My very own Mama still taking care of me and my babies. She makes breakfast and always cleans up behind all of us. I get to nurse, pump, bathe, clothe, hold, kiss, sing to, read to, and love on my children all day long. Except for the times when I have to take Berek in to the lab to have his blood drawn. Which is every day. He's jaundice. We have to keep the biliblanket on him as much as possible. He doesn't mind tho.

I love to have both my kids. I love having more than one. I can't believe how much I love them both!! But I would be lying if I said that I had mastered dividing my attention. I can't help but want to hold Berek all day every day....every second!! But Shelbi is still here too. And she needs what she's always deeded......ME!! How do I do two???

Mom is really helpful in that she takes Shelbi at night. But I miss her. I miss having her all to myself at night. I miss cuddling with her as she drifts off to sleep. Berek can't be cuddled like that because he's too little, and I might roll over on him!!! Shelbi has been testing me as MUCH AS SHE CAN!! When I say no, she hears "Do it again!! And again! And again!!"

I know it's the transition phase, but I wish I knew how to handle it better.