Still no baby
Another day, and no baby. Another long, long day, and no baby. I'm 38 weeks on Thursday, and yes, I'm having only normal pregnancy symptoms. Nothing out of the darn ordinary. DANG IT! How do women DO this?
I never felt this way with Shelbi. I never felt this desperate or miserable. I never felt chlostrophobic<---------spelling?
I never felt soooo helpless, or fat, or inadequate, or....whiny.
Really. I complain non-stop. I try to focus on other things, and often, it works. For about 5 minutes. Remind me not to EVER do this again. At least not before I get hitched. Geez.
Mom is making my life so much easier though. I came out of Shelbi's room the other day and said "We need shelves.". I gave it no second thought, but the next day, Mom was on a mission. We went to Home Depot and out of nowhere, she pulled out enough money to pay for the lumber to build shelves!! They're big, too. 6 feet high and 5 feet across. She cut out Winnie The Pooh shapes all up and down the sides. It's almost done, and then I will paint it the same colors as Shelbi's room. It will be so nice to be able to stack stuff on her shelves than on the floor!
I'm blown away every now and again this past month. I keep remembering that I am having a second child, and what that means...not just for me, but for Shelbi. I was filling out his baby book, and it had a place for siblings' names. I almost skipped that part, but remembered, wait!!! He has a sister! She has a brother, and he has a sister! When I shop, I buy stuff for him, AND her!! I need space for her clothes, AND his clothes!! Pretty soon, there will be his and her toys. Oh crap. Here it comes. I can see it now. Mine!! No that's MINE!! MINE!, NO MINE!!. Oh, bother. But I love it. I wish that I could just devote all my time to the kiddos, and home. I wish that I didn't have to go to work. I wish that I didn't have to worry about school. I wish I wish I wish. I wish I had a house. WAIT! I already do.
If I only had a dependable car. WAIT! I have two.
I wish my Mom were around to help. WAIT!! She lives with me.
If only I had enough food, enough clothes for us all, nice things in our home.....WAIT!! I already do!! Really. I think all the time about what I don't have. I really should pay attention to what I DO have. I do have a lot.
I never felt this way with Shelbi. I never felt this desperate or miserable. I never felt chlostrophobic<---------spelling?
I never felt soooo helpless, or fat, or inadequate, or....whiny.
Really. I complain non-stop. I try to focus on other things, and often, it works. For about 5 minutes. Remind me not to EVER do this again. At least not before I get hitched. Geez.
Mom is making my life so much easier though. I came out of Shelbi's room the other day and said "We need shelves.". I gave it no second thought, but the next day, Mom was on a mission. We went to Home Depot and out of nowhere, she pulled out enough money to pay for the lumber to build shelves!! They're big, too. 6 feet high and 5 feet across. She cut out Winnie The Pooh shapes all up and down the sides. It's almost done, and then I will paint it the same colors as Shelbi's room. It will be so nice to be able to stack stuff on her shelves than on the floor!
I'm blown away every now and again this past month. I keep remembering that I am having a second child, and what that means...not just for me, but for Shelbi. I was filling out his baby book, and it had a place for siblings' names. I almost skipped that part, but remembered, wait!!! He has a sister! She has a brother, and he has a sister! When I shop, I buy stuff for him, AND her!! I need space for her clothes, AND his clothes!! Pretty soon, there will be his and her toys. Oh crap. Here it comes. I can see it now. Mine!! No that's MINE!! MINE!, NO MINE!!. Oh, bother. But I love it. I wish that I could just devote all my time to the kiddos, and home. I wish that I didn't have to go to work. I wish that I didn't have to worry about school. I wish I wish I wish. I wish I had a house. WAIT! I already do.
If I only had a dependable car. WAIT! I have two.
I wish my Mom were around to help. WAIT!! She lives with me.
If only I had enough food, enough clothes for us all, nice things in our home.....WAIT!! I already do!! Really. I think all the time about what I don't have. I really should pay attention to what I DO have. I do have a lot.
posted by Tedweena77 @ 8:49 PM
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